I know some women who won’t get on the dating app Bumble because it requires women to make the first move. With every heartache, you’re one step closer to finding the man who won’t break your heart. Know that you’ll get hurt…and that this is simply part of life and love. And truth be told: building a fortress around your heart doesn’t provide real protection from heartache. So while you might try to take the Scarlet O’Hara attitude of not letting things bother you and not letting men get too close, what you’re really doing is walling yourself away from love. “ When we lose the ability to be vulnerable and close ourselves off to love, we also lose our ability to experience the joy that comes from relationships.” The more you’ve been hurt in past relationships, the harder it is not to do this, and I get it. Do Not Wall Away Your Heartīeing vulnerable is okay it’s where the love pours in. Realize that a man is more likely to want a relationship with a woman who is confident, independent, and funny than one who’s grilling him about every aspect of his life. If you start at the outset making it clear you’re looking for your next husband, not only will you limit yourself, but you’ll also freak him out. So you might decide to keep things casual. And you never know: you might have insane chemistry with a guy you start dating…even if there’s no long-term potential. I know you’re tired of the BS that comes with dating, and I know you don’t want to waste time on the wrong guys, but remember to make it fun! The truth is, while you want a long-term relationship, if you eliminate guys who don’t instantly say that’s what they’re looking for, you might miss out on some pretty great opportunities to get to know cool men. You look at a first date like a job interview, only you’re the one doing the interviewing. Avoid Coming on Too Strong It Can Scare Some Guys Away To help you find love at this point in your life, I have some customized tips to help you go from being 40 and single…to being 40 and in love! 1. But consider this: you’re smarter than you were in your 20s, and you have enough experience in love and life to know what’s worth pursuing and what’s not. Yes, dating after 40 looks different than it used to. But take it from me, the guy who has helped thousands of women - many of whom were 40 or older - find the love of their lives. I know that whatever you’ve been through has made you a skeptic when it comes to changing your status from being 40 and single. Don’t let being 40 and single frustrate you!
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